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The Case of the Missing Screws – A Rant

I realized something last night, I have a difficult time watching or listening to something for pure entertainment without imposing real-life judgement and opinions on it. Is this what the rest of my life will be like?! It’s torture! I was watching Gilmore Girls last night, yet again, and I got so annoyed because Rory is the most obnoxious, entitled, spoiled brat literally ever. The mother/daughter relationship is a toxic friendship at best and I just can’t watch it. What mother would behave like the pouting, simpering immature woman that Lorelai is? Ugh. I tell  you, does anyone else experience this? Why can’t we just mindlessly take in entertainment simply for the sake of it? But then, on the flip side, I can listen to Coast to Coast all day and be like – that shit probably happened.

Anyway, I have a grievance, I ordered this shelf unit from Urban Outfitters because I have become obsessed with their home-wares and I had some open walls in my room. It’s super cute, it’s a lightweight metal that is brushed gold with a mirror – it’s truly lovely and I am so pleased to own it. I was waiting very patiently for it to arrive, I swear Ace Ventura delivers my packages because he doesn’t knock, you just hear a thud as your shit is tossed at your door. I had the box cutter ready to go and my power drill and my tape measure and all of the tools out to hang this bad boy. I get it all unpacked, dusted off and go to pull out the screws but guess what? There aren’t any freaking screws! I literally dismantle the box looking for these screws that should exist but don’t, these 2 cent screws that Urban Outfitters couldn’t be bothered with apparently. So, I get real down on myself and feeling sorry myself that I don’t have anyone to hang shelves for me and blah, blah, blah. But the thing is, I never had anyone to hang shelves for me, I was responsible for all of the projects and I can hang a damn shelf – no inanimate object makes me question my self-worth. So I take some measurements and drive to the hardware store to pay almost two dollars for some freaking screws. I get back, bust out the drill, well it’s dead, of course. It reminded me of this time that my friend was remodeling her new home and was pissed off that some screws had been hammered into the wall and said – who hammers in a screw. Pissed off single women who just want to hang a damn shelf but their stupid freaking drill is dead – that’s who. I’ve chewed about a pack of gum in an hour at this point and just can’t wait for the drill to charge up so I bust out the screwdriver intent on just using sheer brute force to get the screws in the wall. Awesome, screws are in and all I have to do is slip the shelf brackets over them. Well, turns out that the heads of the screws are too big to fit through these teenie freaking brackets that this shelf is equipped with. So, the screws come out and I realize that I have to hold the shelf in place with one hand while replacing the screws, the freaking thing only weighs 6 pounds but of course feels like I’m trying to lift a Mini-Cooper with one arm. I finally, finally get the shelf secured but one feels a little wiggly and it’s probably going to come loose and blow a hole in my apartment wall and then I am going to be evicted, I just see this happening all because Urban Outfitters couldn’t supply two measly little screws. It looks cute though:

Midellion Demo Regular

4 Comments

    • quitesimplystella

      The best was the employee at the hardware store asks: Well what screws did it come with. I was like – shut up. Hahaha! It is a pretty little piece 🙂

  • hoiyinli

    Oh Stella. 😂I hope you got a few good chuckles out of writing this because I certainly did whilst reading this. I lost it when you said “Pissed off single women who just want to hang a damn shelf but their stupid freaking drill is dead – that’s who.” Let’s be pissed off single women together. 😝

    Seriously though, that sucks that UO couldn’t be bothered to supply a few screws like geez…

    • quitesimplystella

      Hahahaha! While I was standing there, I was thinking – why cant I just hammer these in?! I didn’t but I was close. Lets do, it’s mostly awesome 😀

      Right?! I feel like it’s just cheap, especially since so much of their stuff is seemingly overpriced. They sell a lot of homewares, I guess now I know…

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